Tidal waves don't beg forgiveness

Finality is so rare in our society. There are few things that are final (I'm glad to have just received my tax returns), so when I found myself in a discussion about a final point at a long journey, it was somewhat surreal. I don't think the reality really sunk in at the time, but now it is just that - the journey ended, final, not really for any logical reason and not necessarily at a natural point. It's not really a tragedy, or a sorrow, just final. Done.

It makes me think about what I would go back and change, and what I'm glad to be done with. Everyday thoughts of the past and the future enter my mind. Too often I think about the loss of someone I'm close to, and not often enough do I think about the quality of my own life.

There's a quote that life is frittered away by details. I used to just think it meant forget about the details. But I realize that almost everything I do, or think about is the details. In being faced with finality in one course of my life I realized how little thought I gave to the bigger picture. Beyond grad school decisions, tasks at work, plans with people. But now, it's spring, so all I do is talk about how busy things are at work, and think about how busy I am, and work busily, and fritter.